**I am prefacing this blog post by saying that I am very opinionated. I am posting this on here instead of talking about it, because you have the option to press "X" and close out. :) I promise to get to the Kinder stories though...hold out? :)
-This week I was informed about a certain politicians idea of how to "solve" education funding issues. Let's just say that I am disgusted on every level. It is so hard for me to come to terms with the fact that I live in a world where we are refusing to open our eyes. I understand that we are entitled to different opinions, but if we REALLY want to be like Christ...we should be very ANTI "The rich get richer, the poor get poorer" type of ideas.
--Another disgust? Hearing people say that "those poor people" need to earn something for themselves. The "Why should I work my butt off just to give out handouts?!" mentality baffles me. I guess it comes down to what we believe about whether or not we've earned anything that we have. I don't believe that I have. I believe EVERYTHING I have is a gift. I was born into a middle class family, my parents valued education and worked with me outside of school, my parents gave me a car (not a new car, but still a CAR!) to drive when I was 16, I took music lessons, I went to church every Sunday, I was encouraged to go to college, I could afford college, both of my parents worked, my dad lived at home, I didn't have to raise my younger siblings, I spent a lot of time with my youth group, I was rarely if ever approached with drugs or alcohol. I NEEDED NO "OUT". My life was easy. I grew up very priveledged. Of course I am now able to work a full time job, etc. I am not saying that we should expect nothing out of people, but I see how some of my kids are growing up. I understand why the cycle is SO hard to break. We have NO idea of what it is like. None.
Second--I have been to these homes. Before I went to visit my students' families, I thought I knew what poverty was. I thought I knew the disgusting difference in economic wealth. I had no idea. Do you really think people WANT to live like that? They are doing the best they can.
--Ok, let me say, there are definitely parents who do not deserve to raise such beautiful, sweet children. There are children who are abused, mistreated, neglected, etc. But those kids need more opportunities given to them through school than other kids do! EDUCATION IS THEIR ONLY WAY OUT OF THE CYCLE.
*I am reading a book called Radical, by David Platt. At first I didn't like it much, but being the multi-tasking girl I am, I was reading it today while running on my treadmill. (I get sick reading in a car, but not while running on a treadmill. Weird, right?!) It talks about how Christ calls us to be Sheep among wolves. The author talks about non-Christians looking at Christians really following the actions of Christ and thinking that we are INSANE. I want to care for these people who "don't deserve it" the same way that I know Christ would. I want to open my house, my bank account, my heart & my time to these kids. I am sorry to be ranting so much, but I am so sickened by the fact that the thought would even cross someones mind to make things even more unfair than they already are!!! Moving on....
--I really did have a great week. I have been working like crazy making new games for my centers. The only bad thing about new ideas, is a LOT more work. :) It's alright because the kids love to learn. One of the K teachers at my school gave me some great ideas. One is a letter writing station where kids can write letters to their friends in the class, then they can put the letter in the child's mailbox. When EVERY kid in the class has a letter in their mailbox, I'll deliver the letters. They begged me to make a mailbox for me, and the letters in there already are SO sweet. Man, I love them!
*It's the weekend before 4 tests for my husband, which means tons of time to be productive for me. Last night I baked, made center games, cleaned my house, and today I went to a teacher store. (He usually doesn't let me go alone, knowing I'll spend WAY too much!) I had so much fun buying games for my kids to play at centers. (At this point, I'd rather spend the money than the time). Some of the games said "7 and Up" but I knew my kids could do them. It continues to baffle me...These kids who were SO far behind coming into kinder, and now some of them are reading at 1st grade levels.
*I am so attached to my class this year. The thing I love the most about them is the way they all interact together. The environment in my room is SO sweet. I think a teacher can teach a lot of that, but I think a lot of it is them. They really care about each other. Recently though, some of my kids have been saying really rude things to each other. So during social studies I did a lesson using the Ugly Duckling. I gave each student a piece of paper when they walked in the door after library time. I asked them to draw their face on it. When they had done that, they brought their paper to the carpet and sat in a circle. We talked about what it means to be a good friend, etc. Then I told them I was going to read a book about some friends who were NOT good friends at all. And everytime somebody said something mean to the Ugly Duckling, we were going to crumple the picture of our face. Some of my students' faces were so SHOCKED to hear how mean the other ducks were to the U.D...I love that. Anyway, at the end of the story, I told them that I wanted them to flatten out their paper to look perfect like it did before. They tried and tried. I told them a paper with wrinkles was NOT acceptable. At the end, we talked about how we couldn't get the face back to normal because when we say mean things to our friends, it really hurts them. And that we can't take it back just by saying sorry. We have to be careful with our words. They have been much better friends since. :)
*During Centers: "Mrs...Johnny said a BAD word." Thinking it was 'stupid' or 'dumb', I asked my student not to tattle, but asked him what word he said. "I can't say it Mrs. It's REAL bad." I started to get a little concerned. Me-'Johnny, what word did you say?" Johnny shook his head. "I was just trying to write my name and I wrote it wrong, so I said a word." The other student said..."Mrs., He said "F***". I almost fell over. WHAT?! a 5 year old?! Now--this is probably my SWEETEST student. He has NEVER gotten in trouble. I pulled him aside and told him that was a VERY bad word and that we NEVER want to say that. At school OR at home. He nodded and started to cry. I had to send him to time-out just to ensure that he got the point. :( I still can't believe that! Wow.
*During writing time, we are writing "All About" Books...This week we did "All About Dogs". We talked about everything the kids knew about dogs and made a web. I asked if any of my students had a pet dog. A few did. I asked if anyone else had any kind of pet at their house. One student raised her hand: "Mrs. I used to have a pet ladybug, but it died." :) LOVE it!
*In the prize box last week, I put some headbands. I wear headbands a lot now because I have short hair...One of my little girls: "Mrs. I'm gonna pick this headband cuz I really wanna look like you." :)
*Probably my favorite lesson I've ever taught was the Friday before MLK Jr. Day. I was a little nervous about how I was going to teach it, considering that I am the only white person in my room. ;) When they came back from PE class, I asked them to have a seat at their tables. I said: "If you are a girl, you can go to whatever center you want, play whatever game you want and talk as much as you want. Go ahead. If you are a boy, put your heads down and do not talk. If you talk at all, I'm moving 3 behavior bears!!!" Somehow I kept a straight face. The girls were so excited. I was afraid the boys would cry. I let it go on for about 2 minutes. Then I called all of my students to the carpet. I told them that was an experiment and assured the boys they were not in trouble. I asked them how they felt. I asked the boys if they thought it was fair. A resounding "NO!!!" was the answer. We went on to talk about MLK. I read them a story about him, and explained the segregation of blacks and whites. Their faces were full of both pure shock and disgust. We talked about how it doesn't matter what we look like on the outside, but what is on the inside that is important. That we want to be good people, etc. and that makes us beautiful. Then I sent them back to their seats. I gave them each a paper towel and a handful of M&Ms. I asked them to seperate them by color. Once they all had them grouped, I told them to eat their favorite color of M&M. "How does it taste?" 'GOOD!' They all responded. Then I asked them to close their eyes and pick a random M&M. "How does it taste?" One student-'Mrs., it tastes EXACTLY the same.' We went on to talk about how the color of our skin doesn't matter. We decided as a class that we don't care what people look like and that differences are good. I bit into an M&M and showed them the inside. I bit into another color and we saw that the inside was exactly the same. We decided that they should mix all the colors together and enjoy them that way. One of the boys: "Mrs. I sure think it looks better this way!" Me-'I agree Tommy!' :) They ate their M&Ms and colored a book about MLK Jr. until it was time to go home. I wish our society thought more like 5 year olds....
* While they were eating their M&Ms..."Mrs., when you have babies, are you gonna be a mom?" Me-"Yes. But I don't have babies now do I?!" Students-NOO! But you do have a nephew and niece! One student-"Mrs. You never show us no picture of them." I went to my desk and grabbed a frame with a picture of my sweet nephew and niece. I took it around to each table and showed them. "AWWW! SO cute" Me-Their names are Luke & Natalie. Students-"Luke and Natalie?!" (Their faces showed that they thought those were the weirest names ever...My thoughts--I know, white people names:) haha)
*My sister in law gave me robots for Christmas for my students to decorate. For our Friday fun activity this week for the kids who had good behavior all week, I pulled out markers, turned on some music and let them decorate them. "We get to take these home?!" "Can we name it?!" I knew they'd be excited, but I had no idea HOW excited they'd be. "Mrs., I named mine Luke." :) At the end, I told them they were from my sister, and asked if they wanted to say 'Thank You'? They all wanted to, so we made a video of them saying thank you to her. :) Great way to end a Friday.
*"Bye Mrs. See ya Monday." Student runs off. Student comes back looking worried. Me-"DId you forget something?" Student-"Mrs. I love you!!" Hugs me and runs off. :)
*"Mrs. I had a real good dream last night. You was in it."
*I offered to have indoor recess in my room everyday this week. The other teachers thought I was so sweet. The reality is that I picked Toy Story for the kids to watch. It's my fav kid movie and I wanted to see the whole thing. ;)
*It is so cold out. I have turned into the queen of wearing boots-I LOVE boots. "Mrs. I know the white people, they like those shoes like that. I want some too." Haha....umm?
*I was so sad about my sister the other day, after talking to her I felt so discouraged for her. Then my husband asked me a question about school. I went on about my kids for an hour. I smiled as I went to bed. They bless me much more than they know. While running today, I reminded myself that I can't take a single second for granted. I have to give it everything I have. For all I know, I could go for an MRI tomorrow and find out I have the same thing that my sisters do. I could lose my ability to live such a demanding life. Until then, I will live 100% devoted to these kids. People keep warning me to slow down and not burn out...I get it, but I truly don't see how you can burn out when the kids are so needy and so sweet. I will sure be hearbroken if I don't get to teach K next year!!!
*I am so blessed to have the greatest husband. I really did marry my best friend. I can't wait until next weekend to get to spend more time with him. Weekends like this, though, give me a chance to be a good wife. I always feel so tired/overwhelmed with school work that I don't get to clean the house as well as I want to, or cook, or bake, etc. But this weekend I get to be a "good wife" and that makes me happy. The little things... :)
*I'm really starting to pray about what I should do this summer. I spread my paycheck out over the year so I can have time to volunteer....I'm thinking about volunteering at the after school center a lot of my kids go to--they have a summer program, or maybe taking in a child, or maybe starting a women's BIble study/breakfast at the government housing a lot of my families live in....Really praying for the Lord to lead. He will.
**I have become a little obsessed with Yo-Yo Ma. He was in town and the tickets were sold out for months. :( My husband tried to trade KU Bball tickets for YoYo Ma tickets. THAT is true love, right?! Oh well...YouTube is good enough for me! :)
Happy Weekend!!
:)
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Listen!!
**We're back to reality! As you know from my last blog post, we started the break really wrestling with hard stuff...the rest of the break continued to take that theme. Although it was WONDERFUL to be with family, sleep in, spend time as "real people": cooking, cleaning, playing, running, eating WAY too much....a lot of heartbreaking things people I love were dealing with also came to surface. I spent a lot of hours on my treadmill crying out to God. I kept asking my husband when life was going to be "normal and happy". His answer has stuck with me in a strong way--"I don't think it's about being happy or everything being ok--I think it's about finding joy in the midst of deep pain." My sister has had brain problems for many years--it has been a deep sadness in my family. She has 2 small children who have been a unreal source of joy. They have brought so much healing to all of us. Last week we found out my sister's brain is causing more life-threatening problems than ever and that surgery is a real possibility again. My head and heart immediately flashed back to 4 years ago, when she had to go through all of this. My little sister was recently diagnosed with the same issue. One of the hardest things about this is that I don't live in the same city as my family. In the past, it brought me some comfort to be at the hospital with my family, to help give showers, watch the kids, or even just go for walks with my mom to talk. Now, I feel so guilty being so far away. In some ways, I think the Lord is using this to allow me to trust Him to bring other people to help. My heart is broken, but I am not without hope. I found this scripture in 2 Corinthians during a "reflective" service at church last week. I love it!--"Our hearts ache, but we always have joy...For God can use sorrow in our lives to help us turn away from sin and seek salvation. We will never regret that kind of sorrow."
*Having such a demanding job will make it hard to help my family during this time, but it is also a blessing. I was eager to go back to school. I had missed my students and was ready to get back to "real life". The 2 days this week were SO fun. I smiled all day long working with my sweet students. I overheard one student during centers telling her friend "I really missed Mrs. when we were not at school. I love her". I feel the same, my sweet student! :)
*I have a VERY tiny student--about the size of an average 3 year old. But let me tell you--she is not without attitude. :) She is so funny. One of my students is a little bit of a mess-at centers, I walked past their group and asked :"Who got both of these games out and didn't put them away" All of the kids in the group answered with frustration, "Billy!!" Me-"Billy", I need you to pick both of those games up before you do anything else. He nodded. I walked back to my table to pull my reading group, but watched to make sure he picked it up. I saw him bothering my tiny girl who was playing a game. She started to wag her finger at him and said with more attitude than you can imagine: "Listen! You better go pick up those 2 games like Mrs. said before you even start to talk to me. OK?!" hahaha I looked at her and shook my head at her, and she just smiled. Hey--the boy listend. :)
*When we take bathroom breaks, my girls are always a little slower than the boys--we always have a little competition to see which line (boys/girls) is ready first after bathroom and drinks. I whispered to them--The boys win today! They were so fast and they are stading SO quietly. One of my little girls' response: "Mrs., Why do we need to make everything a competition?" HAHAHA Sorry kid-I'm too competitive, I've been told. :)
*I was anxious to see the girls whose families we adopted for Christmas. They both came in wearing their new clothes and shoes. They looked so cute. During writing time, we were writing about what we did over break. Both of those girls wrote that they played with baby dolls that they got for Christmas. :) So sweet. As I walked around writing time, I was shocked to see my students' writing. I had assumed that since many of my students didn't speak English all break and that others spent hours in front of the TV, that we would have to review a lot...but they were picking up RIGHT where we left off. Many students told me throughout the day that they really missed school. They were so glad to be back.
*We are starting to practice our last names. Most of them have picked it up very quickly and are writing first and last names on every worksheet/activity. I have to say--I pity my Hispanic kids who have 2 last names...One kid: "Mrs...this name is too big-I can't fit it on my paper". :)
*"Mrs...next year when we make Christmas presents for our moms, can we make them some cookies?" Me-That's a great idea, but next year you'll be in 1st grade, and I won't be your teacher. You are going to have a new teacher. Student-"WHAT?! NO!!!" The whole table of kids-"NO!!!!!" **Trust me kids--I'm going to be more sad about it than you are! :(
*During centers on our first day back, one of my students came up to me: "Mrs. I didn't work this hard all break. When I get home, I'm SERIOUSLY gonna need a nap." :)
*While we were waiting in the hallway for my students to get drinks at the water fountain before our afternoon recess, one of my students told me that his uncle was shot with a gun and that he had to lay down and rest a lot. My response: "That is so sad. I am so sorry." I went on to tell them that guns are very dangerous and I never want them to touch one. If they ever see one, I want them to tell an adult, etc. One student: "Mrs. I saw one under my couch but I didn't touch it. I won't Mrs. I never will." :(!!!!!!!!!
*I can't put into words how much fun we had being back at school. My class and I have such a sweet connection. We learned more letters, new sight words and they cracked me up all day long. Being with the kids heals me--a lot of these kids have harder lives than I could ever imagine...yet to me, they are bright beams of joy. It reminds me of this quote: "Be kind, for everyone is fighting a great battle".
*Math this week has been so fun! I am starting a geometry unit and it is very open to "exploring". I have been SHOCKED at the creativity of my students. We made shapes posters, sang our songs about the shapes, and then I gave them each a shape and a piece of paper. They had to look at the shape (circle/square/triangle/etc) and decide what it looked like and make a picture with it. For example, I used a circle and colored it like a basketball. Then I glued it onto my paper and drew people playing basketball and a hoop, grass, etc. You should have seen the pictures they made--I saw donuts, cookies, baseballs, heads of monsters, heads of people, hula hoops, a wheel, etc. They had so much fun with it. Everyday during math centers, they get to choose a new shape to add to their "shape book", they also go to explore with playdoh to make shapes, make pictures using pattern block shapes, and explore on the Geoboards with rubber bands. EVERY single kid was so eager to show me what they made. Some of my kids are really "out of the box" thinkers so they dominated these activities. My student who used to fall out of his chair all the time and threw up when he cried--made Catwoman with pattern blocks. It REALLY looked like Catwoman. Then he made a rabbit with different shapes he had made with playdoh. I was very impressed. It was SO fun.
*There is so much to look forward to this week besides teaching. I know the kids will be fun this week and I have some very fun lessons I think they are going to love. I get to go to kickboxing class (Found a Groupon for cheap and I am SO excited! My husband bought one too, and so did one of "couple" friends--what better way to destress and get out some anger about my sisters' issues than kick and punch a bag!), Bible study with our wonderful friends--we are so blessed with great friends through the med school, go help at our college campus ministry retreat, and I get to go see my family next weekend.
I was reading a book my husband bought me for Christmas: Radical by David Platt. He bought it for me because he knows I love to read extreme books. I'm not really sure how I feel about the book, but I like that it gets me to thinking--I agree with about 60% of what he writes, but this one part, I really like:
I find it interesting that one of the most common questions asked today among Christians is "What is God's will for my life? or How do I find God's will for my life?" Many Christians have almost assumed the attitude that they would obey God if he would just show them what he wanted them to do. In the middle of a Christian culture asking: How do I find God's will for my life? I bring good news. His will is not lost. The answer is clear. The will of God is for you and me to give our lives urgently and recklessly to making the gospel and the glory of God known among all peoples. The question, therefore, is not Can we find God's will? The question is "Will we obey his will?" Will we refuse to sit back and wait for some tingly feeling to go down our spines before we rise up and do what we have already been commanded to do? Will we risk everything--our comfort, our possessions, our safety, our security, our very lives--to make the gospel known among unreached peoples? Such rising up and such risk taking are the unavoidable, urgent results of a life that is radically abandoned to Jesus.
*I love that!
:)
*Having such a demanding job will make it hard to help my family during this time, but it is also a blessing. I was eager to go back to school. I had missed my students and was ready to get back to "real life". The 2 days this week were SO fun. I smiled all day long working with my sweet students. I overheard one student during centers telling her friend "I really missed Mrs. when we were not at school. I love her". I feel the same, my sweet student! :)
*I have a VERY tiny student--about the size of an average 3 year old. But let me tell you--she is not without attitude. :) She is so funny. One of my students is a little bit of a mess-at centers, I walked past their group and asked :"Who got both of these games out and didn't put them away" All of the kids in the group answered with frustration, "Billy!!" Me-"Billy", I need you to pick both of those games up before you do anything else. He nodded. I walked back to my table to pull my reading group, but watched to make sure he picked it up. I saw him bothering my tiny girl who was playing a game. She started to wag her finger at him and said with more attitude than you can imagine: "Listen! You better go pick up those 2 games like Mrs. said before you even start to talk to me. OK?!" hahaha I looked at her and shook my head at her, and she just smiled. Hey--the boy listend. :)
*When we take bathroom breaks, my girls are always a little slower than the boys--we always have a little competition to see which line (boys/girls) is ready first after bathroom and drinks. I whispered to them--The boys win today! They were so fast and they are stading SO quietly. One of my little girls' response: "Mrs., Why do we need to make everything a competition?" HAHAHA Sorry kid-I'm too competitive, I've been told. :)
*I was anxious to see the girls whose families we adopted for Christmas. They both came in wearing their new clothes and shoes. They looked so cute. During writing time, we were writing about what we did over break. Both of those girls wrote that they played with baby dolls that they got for Christmas. :) So sweet. As I walked around writing time, I was shocked to see my students' writing. I had assumed that since many of my students didn't speak English all break and that others spent hours in front of the TV, that we would have to review a lot...but they were picking up RIGHT where we left off. Many students told me throughout the day that they really missed school. They were so glad to be back.
*We are starting to practice our last names. Most of them have picked it up very quickly and are writing first and last names on every worksheet/activity. I have to say--I pity my Hispanic kids who have 2 last names...One kid: "Mrs...this name is too big-I can't fit it on my paper". :)
*"Mrs...next year when we make Christmas presents for our moms, can we make them some cookies?" Me-That's a great idea, but next year you'll be in 1st grade, and I won't be your teacher. You are going to have a new teacher. Student-"WHAT?! NO!!!" The whole table of kids-"NO!!!!!" **Trust me kids--I'm going to be more sad about it than you are! :(
*During centers on our first day back, one of my students came up to me: "Mrs. I didn't work this hard all break. When I get home, I'm SERIOUSLY gonna need a nap." :)
*While we were waiting in the hallway for my students to get drinks at the water fountain before our afternoon recess, one of my students told me that his uncle was shot with a gun and that he had to lay down and rest a lot. My response: "That is so sad. I am so sorry." I went on to tell them that guns are very dangerous and I never want them to touch one. If they ever see one, I want them to tell an adult, etc. One student: "Mrs. I saw one under my couch but I didn't touch it. I won't Mrs. I never will." :(!!!!!!!!!
*I can't put into words how much fun we had being back at school. My class and I have such a sweet connection. We learned more letters, new sight words and they cracked me up all day long. Being with the kids heals me--a lot of these kids have harder lives than I could ever imagine...yet to me, they are bright beams of joy. It reminds me of this quote: "Be kind, for everyone is fighting a great battle".
*Math this week has been so fun! I am starting a geometry unit and it is very open to "exploring". I have been SHOCKED at the creativity of my students. We made shapes posters, sang our songs about the shapes, and then I gave them each a shape and a piece of paper. They had to look at the shape (circle/square/triangle/etc) and decide what it looked like and make a picture with it. For example, I used a circle and colored it like a basketball. Then I glued it onto my paper and drew people playing basketball and a hoop, grass, etc. You should have seen the pictures they made--I saw donuts, cookies, baseballs, heads of monsters, heads of people, hula hoops, a wheel, etc. They had so much fun with it. Everyday during math centers, they get to choose a new shape to add to their "shape book", they also go to explore with playdoh to make shapes, make pictures using pattern block shapes, and explore on the Geoboards with rubber bands. EVERY single kid was so eager to show me what they made. Some of my kids are really "out of the box" thinkers so they dominated these activities. My student who used to fall out of his chair all the time and threw up when he cried--made Catwoman with pattern blocks. It REALLY looked like Catwoman. Then he made a rabbit with different shapes he had made with playdoh. I was very impressed. It was SO fun.
*There is so much to look forward to this week besides teaching. I know the kids will be fun this week and I have some very fun lessons I think they are going to love. I get to go to kickboxing class (Found a Groupon for cheap and I am SO excited! My husband bought one too, and so did one of "couple" friends--what better way to destress and get out some anger about my sisters' issues than kick and punch a bag!), Bible study with our wonderful friends--we are so blessed with great friends through the med school, go help at our college campus ministry retreat, and I get to go see my family next weekend.
I was reading a book my husband bought me for Christmas: Radical by David Platt. He bought it for me because he knows I love to read extreme books. I'm not really sure how I feel about the book, but I like that it gets me to thinking--I agree with about 60% of what he writes, but this one part, I really like:
I find it interesting that one of the most common questions asked today among Christians is "What is God's will for my life? or How do I find God's will for my life?" Many Christians have almost assumed the attitude that they would obey God if he would just show them what he wanted them to do. In the middle of a Christian culture asking: How do I find God's will for my life? I bring good news. His will is not lost. The answer is clear. The will of God is for you and me to give our lives urgently and recklessly to making the gospel and the glory of God known among all peoples. The question, therefore, is not Can we find God's will? The question is "Will we obey his will?" Will we refuse to sit back and wait for some tingly feeling to go down our spines before we rise up and do what we have already been commanded to do? Will we risk everything--our comfort, our possessions, our safety, our security, our very lives--to make the gospel known among unreached peoples? Such rising up and such risk taking are the unavoidable, urgent results of a life that is radically abandoned to Jesus.
*I love that!
:)
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