I'm just SO glad you're here!

*I didn't think I would blog this summer, but because of the INCREDIBLE few weeks I've had, it's time to blog. The Lord has been so good to me this summer-I've had time to clean/organize/relax/do crafty stuff off of Pinterest/visit family/work on stuff for school/hang with friends/spend SO much QT with my husband and read a lot.

*My husband is working at a child abuse & neglect clinic this summer. It has been so hard to watch him process & deal with the terrible things he is seeing. But I am also so proud of the man I married. Last week as I was writing in my prayer journal, I teared up thinking back to college when I spouted out what I was going to do with my life and how I was going to change the world. I wanted to teach in an innercity school and help families. Looking back, I had NO idea what my life would look like today.  My life is SO full because the Lord has called us to give it away. I had an amazing year with my students, got very involved with families, my husband has volunteered at a free clinic, jumped on board with my students and now is giving his summer away to children who are abused & neglected in our city. I am so blessed to have him as my best friend.

*We started our Foster Care classes. We go back and forth between absolute terror and feeling like we GOT this. I made a bunch of stuff off of Pinterest and we have started to set up the potential child's bedroom. I borrowed a bunch of toys from my parents and will pull some books from my classroom. I used a gift card I received through working out a lot to buy curtains and a rug. It just might happen.
But we've also been reading books: "The Boy Called It" (made me almost throw up as I read the TERRIBLE abuse),  "The Lost Boy", "Please Somebody Love Me" and now I'm reading "Building the Bonds of Attachment". The books have opened my eyes to the reality of how hard this might be. But I'm also encouraged that people are stepping up and speaking out for these children. It makes me wonder if I missed signs of abuse/neglect in my classroom....if I could have done more.

*In my husband's clinic and in the books, school is spoken of as a safe haven--where you get food, safety, love, education, friends, etc. They said the summer is a "down time" for the clinic because teachers are not reporting abuse--even though it is STILL happening. It makes me very thankful for the job I have, but also scared for kids this summer. What are they doing? Are they eating? Are they safe? Are they practicing ANYTHING we learned this year?. I can be an advocate for kids who have no voice. I feel so blessed that God trusts me with those kids.

*There are many reasons we want to do foster care, but the main reasons are the SWEET, neglected kids I met all year. I would come home from school with the most terrible stories and didn't know how to process. All I knew, is that if these kids had a mother figure who loved them-didn't hit them-fed them and interacted with them appropriately...they would THRIVE. I went through my year feeling like that, but then one day there were 4 situations with 4 different kids who affirmed for my husband AND I that we had to become foster parents. ALL of those 4 kids are in my group at the center I'm volunteering at. Lord's will???
*Now to the best part of my blog. :) I am volunteering this summer at a VERY poor apartment complex's summer program. It is only 2 mornings a week, but I was assigned all of the kids who just finished Kindergarten (MY kids!! and others that I love). Needless to say I was VERY anxious to check on my kids-to hug them/give them food!! As the kids started trickling in the room, I realized that EVERY kid was from my school. Every kid of every age came up and gave me a hug. They were so suprised to see me. I asked about their summers and hugged them each tight.

Then my kids started coming. One of the boys' jaw dropped and screamed, "MRS!!!!", another came running through the door and gave me a huge hug. She didn't leave my side for the rest of the morning. While the leader of the center was talking, all of my babies were huddled around me. They wanted to touch or be near. They kept looking over and smiling at me. One leaned in and whispered, "Mrs...I'm just SO glad you're here!!" I told her that I was so thankful to be there, too! We were all smiles as we read books, worked in the garden and learned about biking. We did some exercises and the leader challenged the kids to see who could do "plank" the longest. (VERY hard challenge). None of the kids were doing it right except one. This tiny little friend--he was in another class, but is a MESS and I always wished he was my student. This summer makes up for my lost time with him. Anyway, he was holding the plank position for almost a minute--I was cheering him on, and he whispered: This is SO hard. :)

*There was some down time, so I got out a book and read it to my sweet kids. Then I asked if they knew any songs they wanted to sing. We sang one they learned in music class and then one of my kids started singing: "I like it when you call me big poppy!"....UM!? Couldn't believe she knew that song...I told her I didn't think we should sing that. She said...Ok, Mrs!

*I spent the morning hugging my students' moms and catching up on everything. It was so good to see everyone!

*We went through lunch and I saw kids eating more than most adults could-they were SO hungry. As I looked around the room, their clothes were tattered, they were scarfing down food--but they had a GREAT morning with people who really care about them.

*We were outside later and other kids from the apartments were around. Then I saw a little girl SPRINTING across the grass-no shoes, a toothless (huge) smile and jumped into my arms. It was another one of my sweet students. Her mom followed her and said that when she heard I was outside, she leapt off the couch and the mom couldn't stop her before she was out the door and sprinting down the stairs. I told her mom that I was JUST as excited to see her!!!

It was a GREAT day. Before I left, they made me promise I'd be back tomorrow.
And then I went back this morning. Today we got to take the kids swimming. 9 years ago, I had my first summer job as a lifeguard. I worked at a very low income pool and taught swim lessons for free on my breaks. It was the first time I realized that I wanted to be a teacher. I saw these kids--who had no parents around, no money, but PURE joy to learn. I saw kids who were terrified of the water, a few weeks later swimming around the pool.

Today I got to relive that joy. NONE of the kids we took knew how to swim. I spent 3 hours teaching kids how to blow bubbles, kick on the side, to float, and eventually I would hold their bellies as they would kid and paddle around the pool. It was SO fun. Later, I was playing basketball with some older kids and I asked one of the little ones if he wanted to play. He looked at me VERY seriously as he walked around the pool and used his arms to paddle, "No, Mrs! I need to practice my swimmin!" Another little one was SO proud of himself for learning to blow bubbles that he went around to EVERYONE at the pool and showed them. Of course very frequently he sucked water back up his nose, so he would spend a few minutes hacking on the side of the pool. Didn't stop his effort one bit. He beamed with pride.

Some old people were swimming laps next to us in the pool. One of my hilarious girls said: "Mrs-look at that lady. She's doin her exercise. Watch me...I'm doin mine too. (As she did squats, etc. in the water). I couldn't stop laughing.

*One of the kids we adopted for Christmas was talking to me about her toys. I asked her if she liked playing with her doll. Her response: "I threw one of those babies away. She can talk. She can talk just like a person. It's weird-she shouldn't talk--it's a BABY. But I like the ones that don't talk. They're just normal pretend babies. I take care of THEM!" :)

*Older kids told me about how much they've been reading, the little ones (and big ones too) showed me a million tricks. We played shark, etc. It was so fun.

*And then I took one of my sweet girls to the bathroom. Now--you have to understand that every kid with us was black and that most of the other people at the fitness center were white. To the old lady who glared and my sweet student and looked at us both with disgust, I say this: You are blind to the beauty of this child. You need to OPEN YOUR EYES. I was taught to respect the elderly, but I have no respect for you. You are just lucky that my student did not hear your rude remark. It is time to OPEN YOUR EYES to the beauty in all people. I am completed disgusted by your actions.
*We had a great day. It was sad to see these 5-12 year old kids learning to do things I did at much younger ages...but it was so fun to see their joy when they learned. Afterwards, when we were eating lunch, a few of them said: "Mrs-you sure wore me out today. All that swimmin sure was tough".

After we came back to the apartments, they had some extra food so as they got it out, other kids started pouring out of their apartments to get something to eat. They ate every single bit. :(

I'm so thankful for the people that run this center. They give these kids food/a safe place to play and fun experiences. Most importantly, they give the kids love and a sense of worth. Because they ARE worth SO much. Someday soon I might be a foster parent...and I will give the child every opportunity that I possibly can. I don't know why some kids are born into families who are very priveledged, while others are left to fend for themselves. I can't speak to why our society feels that each family is on their own and is disgusted with these adults rather than TEACHING them how to parent/find a job/use their money/etc. But I CAN say that I am SO thankful for my job. I am so thankful for these kids. I love our mutual friendship. I love to hug them and teach them and play with them.

The Lord is powerful and is so good. I can't wait for the rest of this summer.

:)