*Yesterday on the way home from dinner & a movie, I was quiet and looking out the window. (Very abnormal behavior for me). My husband asked me if I was ok, and my response was no. And that I don't think I ever will be again. It has been a very hard week. I will never find peace with the fact that SO many children and neglected and hungry....on that note...

*Today at the dentist, the receptionist asked me what I do. I told her that I was a Kinder Teacher. She said: "Oh my gosh. I could never do that! 25 crazy 5 year olds running around--I bet you want to pull your hair out." No...not really at all. I absolutely adore my class. I keep warning my husband that I am going to be a WRECK in a few weeks when school is out. This week we have a bunch of kids coming to my school to enroll in K for next year and to come visit the school. My principal asked if I would host some of the kids in my room. Of course I said yes! They will get to come in, I will read them a story, we'll do a little craft and eat a snack. I'm excited to meet the kids for next year, but more than that, I'm so excited to see MY kids help the newbies. My students LOVE to help & I know they'll be SO proud to show them what Kindergarten is all about!

*Last Friday was Good Friday, so I did several "Easter" themed activities in class. They did an Easter Egg Hunt in my classroom during reading time. When they found an egg, they took it back to their table, opened it up, and inside was a sentence. They had to read the sentence, write the sentence and draw a picture to go with the sentence. It was so fun. At the end of the day, my husband came and hid Easter Eggs for the kids outside. I told them the Easter Bunny did it. It was SO fun to watch them running and finding eggs. Then we all sat in a circle and I let them eat one piece of candy out of one of the eggs. "This is the best day EVER!!!"

*As the competitive person I am, I created a competition in math. I usually have 3 centers of activities that kids are working on during math time. They rotate through the 3 games. The group that is MOST on task, quietly working, doesn't argue with their partner, cleans up quickly, etc. gets a point each day. On Friday, the team with the most points gets to eat lunch with me in the classroom. Group 2 won last Friday. They reminded me ALL day Friday that they got to eat with me at lunch. They thought it was so funny that I brought my own lunch instead of eating the mystery meat from the cafeteria. We talked about all kinds of things. "Mrs...this is the BESt thing we've ever done. I LOVE eating with you!!" "I wish we could do this everyday!!" They were cracking me up with their stories.

*We have walking club again this month as an after school program. I told my kids if they signed up, I'd do it again and walk with them. I had over half of my class sign up!! haha I spend the whole time, rotating between kids to make sure I get a chance to talk to every kid. It is so fun to be with them outside of school.

*I have a student who is INCREDIBLY low. She came to me in November from another school and didn't know anything that I had already taught. She has also been very slow to catch on...I have volunteers & aids working with her everyday to help her, and have been working with her small reading group every day. She has a LOT of kids who live at her house, and thrives in our class. To give you an idea of how low this child was...Me: This is an A. What letter is this? STudent: P?  Me: No, this is an A...it says "AAA" Let's draw it together. What letter is this? Student: L?

That was in December. This week she sounded out duck, cow & pig to write in her writing book AND read very simple books in my small reading group. SHE IS TAKING OFF!!!! It is SO exciting to see things click for her. Even though she is still so far behind the other kids, I am SO excited at her growth. "Mrs..you're the BEST teacher ever. You're my favorite." :)

*Before school started, my principal told me that sometimes families will be VERY hard on you, and if you survive it, they will accept you and there's no going back after that. I BELIEVE THAT NOW!! I had a family whose child I adore, but he is a MESS. Several times the dad/grandpa have been in my face yelling at me for his behavior problems. Last week the "grandpop" came up to school to talk to me. When I saw him, I was a little nervous. I dropped my kids off at music and went over to talk to him. He went on and on about how well his grandson is doing and how thankful they are. He went on to tell me that there are 2 more girls coming next year and they really want them both to be in my class. haha Talk about a 180.

*"Mrs...you're so pretty." Another student "I like your hair"..."I like your shirt"..."I like how you always dress"..."I like your shoes"..."I like that color paint on your nails"....haha Talk about losing your insecurities ;)

*Today a commercial came on TV for abused animals and how we HAVE to do something about it--that it is going on all around us and that we just CAN'T ignore it....my husband just looked at me, knowing that I was FURIOUS. I'm all for kindness to animals, but COME ON....OPEN YOUR EYES!

*Yesterday I had to give the HARDEST 15 question multiple choice math test to my kids. My 5th graders last year would have missed a lot of these questions. It was written to TRICK the kids rather than test what they know about addition, subtraction & number stories (which they have DOMINATED!). I decided to do it in the morning while they were so calm. (I'm not dumb enough to give my kids a long test on a Friday afternoon)...anyway they actually did great and were SO good for it, that I called them to the reading carpet afterwards, and pulled up the song "Bear Hunt"...we acted it out around the room and they had so much fun. They begged me to do it again. haha  We went on to brainstorming characters/settings/problems for our make believe stories. I will say--all of the cartoon watching is finally coming in handy, because their ideas for characters, etc. were SO good. During writing time, they were SO excited to write their books, that they were all busy working and I lost track of time and we were late to lunch! SO fun.

*Because we worked so hard yesterday, the day flew by. It is really hitting me that the year is almost over, and I just can't accept that I haven't taught them everything I want to...so we are PUSHING it! At the end of the day, the kid were so happy and proud of themselves. "Man! This day went so fast!" "Mrs...we sure did learn a lot today!"

*After recess my kids were in line and one student called out: "Mrs...she has food in her pocket!!" Me-We do not take food out of the lunch room, give it to me. She handed over an apple. While my other kids were in the bathroom, I pulled that student to the side in the hallway.
Me-Why did you take that out of the lunchroom?
Student-We aint got no food at home Mrs.
Me-(Heartbroken)--What did you eat for supper last night?
STudent-Some meat.
Me-(Hugging the child)-Listen to me--if you need food, we don't steal...you ask Mrs. and I will help you. Never take what isn't yours. You don't need to be sneaky. Mrs. will help you!
She hugged me so tight, wiped her tears and went to the bathroom. When we got back to the room, for the first time ever I got my cell phone out while the kids were getting ready for math, texted my husband and asked him to go buy food for one of my students and bring it to me at school. Do you know the best part? He didn't even ask why or question it. He showed up 30 minutes later with fruit, crackers, granola bars, etc. I snuck it into her backpack during PE. She must have noticed that her backpack was heavy after PE because she came up to me and gave me a huge hug and whispered. "Thank you, mrs. I love you".

I don't write this to brag on myself or to make myself feel good--because to be honest, writing this makes me want to vomit. I have been a wreck ever since. Not just for THIS child, but for the THOUSANDS of kids who are hungry. The perfectly behaved kids who are STEALING fruit from the cafeteria at the age of 5 because they need to SURVIVE. I told my husband I want to get a megaphone and walk up and down the streets lined with mansions in this city. I can't solve this problem, you can't solve it either--we have to ALL solve it together. I don't get why we have allowed this?!?!?!??!

*That night at home, my husband listened for a LONG time as I went on and on...some yelling, some crying. The next day I pulled up the paperwork to become Foster Parents. If not now, when? If not us, who? Of course we're still praying & it is a LONG process...but I believe it's the only thing that will give me some peace...I have to do something.

*I'm also really praying about asking this mother if I can take her 2 daughters out once a week in the summer...to subway & the park...or to a movie and a picnic. I know this mother, and I'm sure she'll say yes. I don't want to become removed and comfortable this summer--or I will become exactly what I am disgusted with in this society.

People keep asking me--are you so excited for summer? I always say I'm not ready yet. Of COURSE I'm excited to sleep in, be a person, spend QT with my hubby, have a clean house, have my nephew & niece up to stay with me, etc. but I have a small taste of how some of these kids live--and I know how much they LOVE coming to school. 3 months at home? Maybe isn't the greatest thing.

I am sorry to be SO open...and that my blogs are getting a little less funny. My kids are still hilarious. It's just the heavy things feel so heavy that I have to get it out. Please pray for my students and for their families and for our city and for all of the kids who are neglected.

*I will say that when I was at the dentist today, my dental hygenist was telling me that she is in school to run a dental community clinic for people in poverty. We talked a long time about it--just the kind of convo to encourage me today!!


And I'll end with a quote from Hunger Games--the movie I didn't even want to see because people are so obsessed--but it was good. A man speaking because he wants to keep the weak down: "Hope is stronger than fear. A little hope is ok, but a lot of hope is dangerous."

:)